Monday, May 9, 2011

Lessons I have learned from my boys.


Mother's Day. It's the day we're supposed to take our victory lap, sit back and be served, soak up the praise. This year, the boys (except for the oldest one who has moved just a little too far away, darn it all) were over to help ready the gardens for the big wedding coming up. Watching them work together, listening to them banter, fills me with joy. I got what I wanted the most for them, they have grown up to be friends.
It also had me thinking of all the things I have learned as they have matured. I am not at all the same person I was thirty years ago, when I first became a parent.
Patience. I have learned how to count to ten, repeatedly when necessary. I've learned that "now" is a relative term. I've learned that getting angry later is always an option, but getting angry right away is rarely productive. Sometimes what is not said is more important that what is said.
Perserverance. We are all ADHD in this household, to varying degrees. Some of us have learning disabilities as well. I have watched as my boys have faltered and failed, but never quit, at least not for long. Their victories may not be as flashy at being the top of their classes, but they are just as sweet.
Laughter. I can't imagine surviving this hoard without a sense of humor, and yet, I was rather humorless when I was young. I was so dog-gone serious, diligent, closed even, that I rarely let loose enough to laugh. My boys are quite the comics, and have, on many an occasion, saved their own skins with a well placed quip. It's awfully hard to dress down a kid while you're laughing.
Joy. Tragedies early in my life had me convinced that simple joy was not for me. My sons have taught me that happy moments don't have to be momentous to be profound. And that hugs can cure heartbreak.
Love. Love that doesn't come with strings attached, conditions to be met. Love that just is, just because. Love like no other. My boys (and especially their father), have taught me how to love and be loved, freely, fully and unfailing.
Truly, I am blessed.